Friday, October 31, 2008

When I think of an island, I think of Hawaii...

Not North Ogden... and I prefer the sandy, palm tree kinds where you can get fruity drinks with umbrellas. Not the cement, get in your way when you are driving kinds. Well... you are gonna hear me bitch about this for a while, so be prepared...

I came home from work yesterday to find a 12 inch cement wall in the middle of Washington Blvd right in front of my street. I no longer can turn North onto Washington (to get to daycare, the freeway, Smiths, etc) and if I am coming home from work I cant turn left into my street. Everything that I will now do is going to result in a U-turn or going out of my way to get to my damn house. I am PISSED.

No warning or anything... the damn thing is about half a block long and there isnt a thing I can do about it. I heard it has something to do with the new Zions Bank that is being built across the street... but those customers aren't going to be impacted by it, they can still turn left into the suicide lane, I no longer have one. To top it off, that is the only way in and out of my street. The other way is a deadend into Tom Chamber's buffalo property.

I left a VM for someone at UDOT but they are off until Monday... I also spoke to a NO policeman who was driving by last night who basically said "that sucks", I sent an email that has gone unanswered to NO City, and also sent an email to UDOT.

Being that my son has seizures, part of me is concerned that this is going to impact an emergency vehical getting to us in case of emergency... in addition to the dangers of doing U-Turns in the snow. Ugh! Did I mention this sucks?!?!?

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Time to be Spooky

The kids don't have school tomorrow so today is their big Halloween party. You can't wear masks so we had to get up a little earlier to be creative with face paint. Give me some cardstock and stamps, I am great... other than that, I dont have a creative bone in my body... so kids, when you get to school and realize other mom's can facepaint better that I can, I'm really sorry!!

I think the kids were just happy to dress up and have a party today... infact, Drew was so excited he came to hug me without thinking that we just put black and white paint on his face and accidently left an imprint on my sweater. Thanks, buddy. LOL!

(Cynthia, please notice the flower... she knew she wanted to wear it today and spend a good portion of the morning tearing her room apart to find it!)

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

PSS: Happy Redo's

Kim asked "if you could redo anything in your past that was fun/enjoyable/etc, what would it be?"

I can think of alot of happy times in my life that I would like to redo...
*Playing on the swing at my grandparent's house in South Bend.
*Going to my Aunts' house to roll around on the fur rugs and play in Aunt Velma's makeup.
*Night games on Sunnymede Ave.
*Senior Trip to Hawaii
*Any Moab Mama's trip- I love my girls!
*Cruise to Mexico for my 25th birthday (with my parents, without my ex)
*My wedding at the Valley of Fire, just without the wind!

Speaking of which, I got my professional pictures back yesterday... here are a few of them.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Bonding over Basketball

Wednesday night was Ty’s first basketball practice. Because Bryan bowls on Thursdays when her games are she begged him to take her to practice to watch her and being that it was the first one, I wanted to go along too. I was a little nervous for a number of reasons, one being that she didn’t know anyone on the team (goes to FW Elementary but lives in North Ogden) and the second being that she has never played basketball before; although has been begging me for weeks to sign her up. Once we got there, my little social butterfly ran up to some girls and started talking and I found out that half the team has played before the other half hasn’t. My fears were relieved.

I thought she would have fun playing… but I didn’t realize that she would be as good as she was. She scored 5/6 free throws. Her dribbling needed some help, but with some practice she would be ok. All through practice she was laughing and having a good time. She even told Bryan that the next day she was going to go home from school and practice her dribbling in the drive way and sure enough she has, every day since.

Her first game was Saturday morning at 9am. She was so excited for her it she was asking to leave the house every 5 minutes. Mind you, it was 7am when we woke up, it made for a long morning. We got to the gym and my mom and friend Blake met us there to cheer her on. She started the game and it was almost the first quarter before our team scored and she made the first basket!! There was a lot of hooting and hollering from our section.

2nd quarter she played again and scored another basket. She sat out the 3rd qtr and then was back in for the 4th. Her team won 10-6. She had a great time running up and down the court. She was all smiles and just loved it.

Later that day we went to the mall to get Bryan some shoes and he said he wanted to go down to Sports Authority. We had some time to kill so I didn’t think a lot about it. He went right to the basketball section and began his quest to find Ty the perfect “girly” basketball. He ended up getting her a pink and white polka dot ball. She was so excited and the minute we got home went out to practice.

Last night as I was getting ready for my weekly 1 hr of peace and quiet while I watch True Blood, Bryan took the kids out to the drive way to play. I kept watching them out the bedroom window and I started laughing. Somehow they talked him into becoming a human basketball hoop. He is 6’3 and with his arms in the shape of a basket he worked out well. Later I found out that Drew went to shoot and hit him in the face and that was the end of practicing but it was the cutest thing. Drew told me this morning "Dont worry Momma, he isnt mad at me. It was an accident."

They have already fallen in love with Bryan, but to watch the interaction he has with them; it made my heart feel good.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

10/26/08- Mom Update

Thought I would give an update on my mom... She is doing pretty well. She moves a little slower but is still working every day. Even though she is still working 8 hr days, she says she is only working part time because she is used to 10-12 hr days. Her doctor is still amazed with her... said he cant tell her what the average person does b/c she is so out of the norm. Something I have noticed is her memory... I have to remind her of things, which is odd b/c she is normally very SHARP. The Dr said that is a side affect, called chemo-brain, and will come back in 6-9 months.

This Thursday will be her last round of chemo. I am so happy... I know she is being evaluated for radiation, but that is less invasive than the chemo. From what I understand, she will recover from the chemo a bit before that starts, if it does.

Keep her in your prayers... and since its Breast Cancer Awareness month, schedule your mammogram!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

What's Miss Sassy Pants have to say??

I was tagged to have one of the kids answer questions about me... so Miss Ty tells all~

1. What is something mom always says to you? Be good

2. What is something that makes mom happy? I do :)

3. What makes mom sad? When things go wrong with Nannie

4. How does your mom make you laugh? When you tickle me!

5. What was your mom like as a child? I dont know, I wasnt around when you were a child!

6. How old is your mom? 30

7. How tall is your mom? I dunno... big

8. What is her favorite thing to do? scrapbook

9. what does your mom do when you are not around? snuggle with Bryan

10. If your mom becomes famous what will it be for? B/c you are going to be the president

11. What is your mom really good at? EVERYTHING!

12. What is your mom not very good at? math

13. What does your mom do for a job? you are a recruiter at MarketStar

14. What is your mom's favorite food? Chili from Wendy's

15. what makes you proud of your mom? Your hugs

16. If your mom were a cartoon character who would she be? Candice (who the hell is that??)

17. What do you and your mom do together? scrapbook

18. How are you and your mom the same? B/c we act like each other

19. How are you and your mom different? You are older than me

20. How do you know your mom loves you? You tell me

21. what does your mom like most about your dad? Nothing (LMFAO!) or if you mean Bryan, then everything

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go? Vegas

Ty tags Avery (Mary) and T2 (Kim).

Monday, October 20, 2008

Drew and the Tooth Fairy

I picked up the kids last night from their dad and Drew was so excited to show me he lost his first tooth. The adult took was growing up behind it and is been wiggly for a few weeks. I asked if the tooth fairy came and he said "No, I have it in a baggy in my backpack". Guess the tooth fairy doesn't know how to get Washington Terrace, but whatever.

So it was bed time and I got Drew ready and he said he needed to take the tooth out of the baggy, b/c the tooth fairy doesn't know how to open Ziploc. We convinced him that the tooth fairy probably has helpers to open the baggy b/c with our luck, he would lose it and I would be climbing around under his bed looking for it.

I kissed him good night and told him we would leave his (very noisy) door open a bit so the tooth fairy could come in and he said "Mom, the tooth fairy comes up the vent". Oh... OK. I told him his vent was closed so she would have to come up mine and then down the hall so we would leave the door open a bit so she could find the tooth.

About an hour had passed and Bryan was getting ready to come watch TV with me and was going in to get the tooth and leave money and comes into the room and said he was almost busted, Drew's still awake.

I went in to talk to Drew and he said he was waiting up for the tooth fairy. You know, just in case she couldn't get the Ziploc open. So we compromised. He would go to sleep if I unzipped the baggy. Within 15 minutes he was sound asleep and we were able to get the tooth and leave some money for him.

PSS: Comfort Food

Kim asked “What is your comfort food and why?”

I am not sure I have a comfort food… I have favorite foods like sushi, ice cream, etc but none are things I turn to for comfort.

I think something I tend to do is go for coffee when I am stressed, tired, or just need a pick me up in general. My favorite place to go is The Daily Rise. The have fabulous employees, outstanding customer service, and make some fun drinks like the Dancing Queen and a Carmel Rise. Drinking a sugar free Bob Marley always puts a smile on my face :)

Out of Retirement

When Ogden had a dueling piano bar, we were there a couple of times a month. The piano players got to know our rowdy bunch and we would often be called to dance on top of the piano. Since that time, the Diamond Lounge closed down and the new owners seem to only play techno, so we have since migrated down to SLC a couple of times to fulfill our sing-a-long fun.

On Friday we had a big group of friends go down to the Tavernacle ( and we had a blast. Had a couple (ok, a lot) of beers, hung out with some friends, sang along with the requests… and then the part of the evening came where I heard “Lisa and Heather, where are you? Blake has spent $20 for you guys to dance on top of the piano”. Uhmmmm, great. I told all my friends that my piano dancing days were over; I am an old married lady now! Yet there we were… on top of the freaking piano dancing to “Save a horse, ride a cowboy”. Thanks Blake.

BTW, you know it’s really bad when it’s been over a year and in a different city and the piano player still recognizes you… LOL!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

My Insect Encounter

Yesterday I was driving home from work, it was nice out so I had my windows down. I was going down the freeway to pick up the kids and something flew through the window and hit my forehead... I assumed a small rock or something. It didnt hurt and I forgot about it moments later.

I woke up this morning and my forehead was throbbing. I looked in the mirror and I had a little bump with a blister on it. Hmmm... zit? Nah, I think that was the same place the freeway object hit me... I dunno, whatever. I put some coverup on it and went to work.

I was at work for maybe 45 mins and someone yells across the office "OMG! What happened to your head?" Uh... I dunno. I ran to the bathroom. I have a freaking goose egg on my forehead. It was hot and puffy.

People started to get me worried, so I called my Dr but they didnt have any openings until Monday but said the Urgent Care is open if I want to go. Nah, Ill be ok. If its still there tomorrow maybe Ill go.

Another couple hours pass and people are asking me if my husband hit me... if I fell down stairs and hit my head... then the VP of HR comes out and says, "Youre going to the dr now"... so off to Urgent Care I go.

First off, I have to say that Ogden Clinic got me in and out within 40 mins. I am in amazement. I was sure I would be gone for hours.

Secondly, the dr I saw seemed more concerned with my hysterectomy and b12 anemia than the growth on my forehead, but I ended up with a note saying I had an "insect encounter" and that I was allergic to its venom and I have to take antihistamines and use steroid lotion for 5 days .

I sure hope the swelling goes down... I feel like a freak the way everyone keeps looking at me. I dont think the picture shows all the swelling, just the big read bump.

Monday, October 13, 2008

PSS: I'm Sorry...

Shane asked up to write an apology letter to someone we wronged in the past… I have started this letter a few times now and was having a hard time figuring out what exactly to write. I thought about apologizing to my ex-husband, my ex-boyfriend, and even to the wife of someone I dated for a while… but after thinking about it, I think the way I finished my letter is the best way I could have done it.

Dear self,
I am writing you a letter to apologize. I have done some things to you in the past that at the time seemed like a good idea but come to find out they really weren’t.

I am sorry that I put as much effort into the relationship with my dad as I did. It’s still hard to imagine that someone wouldn’t want their own child. I pushed and pushed to try to make my place in his life, but it was a wasted effort. That put us through so much heartache. Finally when I let all that go, I was able to accept my step-father as my dad.

I am sorry that I got married when I did (the first time). I think I was in love with the idea of being loved and maybe not in as much love as I thought I was. I married someone who had completely different beliefs…In God… and although not practicing, it still made it difficult for me to raise my family the way I wanted. The pressure from his family was something hard to deal with. In a relationship… we ended up being roommates with someone who was my spouse. We ended up leading very separate lives in the end. Things happened that I couldn’t forgive or get past. I am sorry that I let the problems go on as long as I did… I know at the time I thought I needed to stick around for the kids. Only later to find out that it was a happier enviroment later on.

Now being married to Bryan and seeing him interact with the kids, I am sorry I pushed my ex-husband was much as I did to be a father. I should have learned from all the crap I went through with my dad, but at the time all I wanted was for them to have a male role model in their lives. Again, it blows my mind how someone wouldn’t want to spend as much time as possible with their own children, but I’ve learned it’s not something I can make someone do. Sometime in the past 10 months I have found that I don’t have try to talk someone into being a dad and have had it proven again that you don’t have to be a Father to be a Dad.

Self, I am sorry that I jumped into a relationship right after my marriage. Part of me is sorry for ruining a really good friendship, but more so I am sorry for being in a relationship with someone who was terrified of commitment. I should have seen it up front. I should have listened to those who told me more about the real side of him. I am sorry that I didn’t realize how self-centered that person ended up being. I am sorry I gave everything I had in me to make that relationship work.

I am sorry that I continued to see a guy even after I found out he was unavailable. I was so hurt from my previous relationships that I wanted someone that I couldn’t fall for, that way I wouldn’t get my heart crushed. It’s not something I am proud of and it’s not something I would ever do again.

Dear self, I learned a lot from the past. I feel I am a better person for what I have been through. I know exactly what it is I want (and deserve) from a relationship. I am sorry that I put a distance between us and God due to the people I had in my life. I apologize because my decisions put us though a lot of tears, frustration, and sadness… but hindsight is 20/20 and I can’t say I regret my past, but I can now say I am sorry for all the bad stuff we have been through to get to where we are today. We are a better person for it all happening as it did and can go forward leading a better life.

Strides Against Breast Cancer 2008

This is the 3rd year that the American Cancer Society has held this walk in Salt Lake City. It’s 3 laps around Liberty Park, which equates to 4.3 miles. Saturday was COLD. It was get your long underwear, socks, and beanies out cold; but breast cancer doesn’t care the weather… its still going to affect 1 in 8 women regardless of rain or snow. Thankfully for us, the rain didn’t start until the walk was done and we were headed back to the car.

St Mark’s Hospital is a flag ship sponsor to this event and my mom is their spokesperson so before the walk started she got up on stage and spoke to everyone about the importance of getting screenings done and how important support from family and friends helps those battling this disease. Her hospital honored her with these shirts:

That’s definitely one thing mom has is support. Me and my family of 5 was there, my sister, my friends (Raquel Blake Jenn Alan and their kids), my other sister and her boyfriend, my cousins with families, my aunt, my dad, my brother…. We had a big group and it was so worth it.

I think the news said they had over 3000 people attend and over $50,000 was raised. My daughter asked me “Mom, how long have you been doing this? How long are they going to keep doing this?” so I told her I have done it since the start and I will continue to do it until there isn’t a need anymore. Hopefully soon there will be a cure and I am going to keep walking until there is one.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Mom update 10/9/08

I am hoping that when my mom goes to the oncologist today that everything is going to check out as it should and she will start her 2nd to last round of chemotherapy. She said she was going to call me after her appointment and let me know what’s going on. She has been feeling so much better since her blood transfusion a couple of weeks ago, I pray it keeps up and we get through this without anymore complications.

Also, this Saturday is our Strides against Breast Cancer walk in Salt Lake City. It’s 4.3 miles around Liberty Park. Our team (Harley’s for Hooters) is going to be there and maybe even bigger than last May. I have my aunt, cousins, siblings, children, nieces, nephews, husband, dad, and friends all involved. You know they all must LOVE my mom to agree to walk outside for a couple of hours in 40 degree rainy weather! Mom is the spokesperson for St. Mark’s Hospital so she will be a keynote speaker right before the walk starts… she will be up on stage with Hope Woodside from Fox13. You may have seen her on the news lately promoting the event.

Here is a new picture I got from my friend Tracy from the wedding… it’s me and my mom before we left for the ceremony. I absolutely love it.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Husband Tag!

1.Where did you meet? We were set up by a gal I used to work with at AOL that now works with Bryan.
2. How long did you date before you got married? We started talking on 12/28/07 and got married on 9/20/08.
3. How long have you been married? 18 fabulous days LOL
4. What is your favorite feature of his? Either his blue eyes or his perfect hair
5. What is your favorite quality of his? He is very caring and gives fabulous hugs
6. Does he have a nickname for you? Babe and Brat are things he constantly calls me, pick one!
7. What is his favorite color? Blue?
8. What is his favorite food? He isnt known to turn down a meal... but likes sushi, steak, and pizza alot.
9. What is his favorite sport? Football, Broncos are his team.
10. When and where was your first kiss? On Jan 3rd, which was our first date. We went to dinner and then later met up at Port O'Call and that's where the kiss was.
11. What is your favorite thing to do as a couple? I just love being around him... anything that consists of me holding his hand.
12. Do you have any children? Not together, but between the two of us we have 3.
13. Does he have a hidden talent? He is a fabulous house cleaner
14. How old is he? 36
15.Who said "I love you" first? He did, but it was more of, "I am not sure how you are going to feel about this... but I am falling in love with you".
16. What is his favorite type of music? anything really, he isnt picky about music.
17. What do you admire the most about him? He is so patient.
18. Do you think he will read this? Its doubtful, unless Mary sends it to him.
I tag....... Amy!

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Genuinely happy

I never thought about what it’s like to be genuinely happy. I know what its like to be sad, angry, frustrated, used, and depressed but I never have taken the time to think about my happiness.

I am one of those people who focuses on everyone else’s happiness. What can I do to make her happy, what would cheer up his day? There was also a time when I went to the extreme opposite for a while. I didn’t care if people were happy, I was looking out only for me because no one else seemed to care if I was happy, so why worry about them? But times have changed…

Just this morning I just woke up with a smile on my face and its not there for any certain reason. I have fantastic kids. Ty is such the little helper, when her alarm goes off she gets dressed and wakes up her brother and then pushes the ON button on the coffee pot for me. Drew is such a lovey kid; he is all about giving me hugs. But those things aren’t new… they have always been great kids.

I think the place I am at in my life is thanks to Bryan. Having him spend time playing toys with Drew so me and Ty can have some time together… having him interact with my family at my dad’s birthday party… and having him be there for Ty who is going through so many struggles when it comes to her dad right now. Those things are so important to me and to have someone to share that with now is an awesome feeling. I love to hug Bryan for no reason, to just hold his hand as we lie in bed and watch TV, just to know he is there.

I truly believe that God brought Bryan into my life when I was finally ready to have a relationship again. I was so heartbroken over things of my past; I did some dumb things just to prove I could, and I ended up pretty jaded. But time moved on and things got easier. I got used to being by myself (with the kids) and grew a strength I didn’t realize I had. I became an independent woman who was able to live on her own and support her children. There is no better feeling than that… although at the time I didn’t realize that something was missing. I gave so much to my prior relationships with nothing in return. I didn’t know what it was like to be in a healthy happy relationship. I needed that time to myself. I believe I am a better friend, daughter, mother, just an all around better person for to it.

So when I met Bryan and he tried to do things for me, it was so foreign. Little things even, opening doors and going out for ice cream. There was even a time I tried to push him away b/c it felt too good to be true… and he pushed back. No one has ever pushed back… people have walked away in the past.

Here we are today. We’ve been married for a couple of weeks now and are adjusting to our new lives together. I couldn’t be happier. I am so in love with this man, he is someone I trust, someone I can tell anything to, someone who loves me and my kids. I thank God every day for bringing him into our lives.

Monday, October 6, 2008

PSS: No regrets

It's my week to post the PSS question and I asked "If you were able to relive your life, what would you change?" and I don't know that I would really change anything significant.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and that you learn from every experience. It could be easy to say "I wouldn't have gotten married at 19", but then I wouldn't have my wonderful kids. Or "I wouldn't have dated my best friend", because then maybe I would still have that friendship, but I really I learned a lot about what I deserve from a relationship from that time of us being together. Those things caused alot of heartache, but its something I needed to do.

I guess one thing I would do differently would be to not to take anything for granted and make sure everyone knows how much I love them. Going through everything with my mom right now, I cant tell you how many times in a day I call just to tell her I love her. You never know if the next time maybe your last time.

So I guess I don't have any regrets about how I've lived my life... I've learned a lot, had a lot of experiences, and have become a better person from it all.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

PSS: Character Flaws

Monica asked "What is one personal characteristic you have that you would like to change?"

I have no patience. I am not a patient person and I tend to snap if things aren't done when they should, if things don't happen as they should, etc. If you ask Bryan, he may have a few more to mention... but this would be on the top of his list as well. In fact, we had a discussion about this last night.

For example, we went to dinner last night. Drew ALWAYS has to have some small toy with him to keep him occupied. As we were getting ready to leave, Bryan told Drew to go back in the booth and get the toy he forgot on the table. Drew crawls in, sits in front of the toy, starts playing with the toy. I'm talking loudly (or yelling, who knows?) telling Drew to hurry up. Bryan said, " calm down, he's putting in back together". Another 10 seconds go by... "Drew, hurry up". Bryan again says "Patience... he is working on it." Eventually Drew gets the toy back together, after Bryan told me to be patient about 4x.

I know the whole "Patience is a Virtue" saying... but its not a virtue I posses. I try. I try really hard, but I continually fail. Bryan is a saint when it comes to patience. He doesn't seem to ever get upset by things so trivial as I do... I am hoping that maybe some of that will rub off on me. I need all the help I can get.