So I am a little behind on my blogging... I missed my Confessions as well as my Friday Fitness update. Oops!
I guess that can be my first confession... Last week was CRAZY. Crazy busy at work... crazy busy at home... crazy busy in general.
I confess... my nephew is getting married in September and he invited all 5 of us to be in his wedding.
I confess... I am down to 172 pounds on my fitness adventure. I did find that the medication I am on makes it extreamly difficult to lose weight.
I confess... I am not going to beat myself up anymore over what the scale says. I am going to eat right and work out and get stronger and healthier in the process.
I confess... this week is Drew's last week for basketball. It was his first season playing and it started out a little rough, but as time went on, he's done really well.
I confess... I am thinking about letting him out of soccer this spring. The fall season was a disaster thanks to a HORRIBLE coach who doesnt know how to communicate, doesnt know how to coach, and honestly I was scared he was going to keel over on the field due to his age and fraility. I am not a mean person... so I say that as nicely as I can, but this was a joke. If AYSO cant move teams, Drew doesnt want to play anymore. It was just a hassle and headache, I dont know that I want to go through it with this coach again.
I confess... I am less than $300 away from hitting my goal for my Guatemala trip.
I confess... I've had my SWAP gifts wrapped for weeks now. I boxed them up yesterday and its sitting in my car ready to go to the post office in Friday. I hope my partner enjoys her gifts!
I think that's it... everyone have a great week!
Monday, February 27, 2012
The Book of Ruth
The Life Project: Ruth
Candice Roberts
As is true in the first seven books of the Bible, so it is true in the book of Ruth; God is the main character; we humans just play supporting roles. At the beginning of this great story we find that the people of God are in a time of famine. There is no food in Israel. And here is Naomi. In the first five verses of Ruth, Naomi moves to a foreign land to try and feed her family, her husband dies, her two sons marry and her two sons die. The events in these verses encompass well over a decade, but they are given such little attention, because they are the preface, what you need to understand before the story starts. You need to understand that death is the human condition and in these verses, the author shows us that Naomi, a child of God, is well acquainted with death. And here is where the story begins.
Naomi resigns to leave Moab and return home. She urges her daughter-in-laws to stay in Moab with their people and their god. But Ruth, a gentile, has come to know Yahweh as God because of Naomi’s influence in her life. She refuses to leave Naomi. And here we see the first instance in the book of Ruth where God exchanges death for life. Because of Ruth’s love for Yahweh and for her mother-in-law, we see that Naomi is given a companion, a friend. God has brought some light out of Naomi’s great darkness. Life from death.
As the two widows travel back to Israel, I wonder what their conversations were like. Would they be able to find food in Israel? Shelter? Would the women ever marry again? Would Ruth ever know what it feels like to be a mother, Naomi a grandmother? Naomi was grumbling, doubtful. Like we would be.
It’s okay that Naomi had her doubts. God was faithful. The two widows had shelter. Ruth was provided with an opportunity to work gleaning barley behind the reapers. She was given favor and the workers purposefully left behind more barley than usual so she could have enough. God was bringing provision where they were certain they would face destitution. Life from death.
Enter Boaz, a relative of Naomi’s deceased husband. Ruth asks him, at Naomi’s prompting, to be their kinsman redeemer. Ruth and Naomi had no way to pay their bills. They had debt and as widows they had few options. They could sell themselves as slaves and work off their debt. This was a common practice in Israel. Or they could find someone to save them from slavery- a kinsman redeemer. There were four requirements for a man to be a kinsman redeemer. The man had to be related, free of slavery himself, capable of paying the debt, and willing to pay the debt. Boaz met these requirements. He bought the land, paid their debts, and married Ruth. He saved them from slavery and gave them a heritage. God used Boaz to once again bring about life from death. And God used Boaz to foreshadow the ultimate Kinsman Redeemer who saved us from the slavery of sin and made us His bride. Jesus Christ, who is life, is OUR Kinsman Redeemer.
Boaz and Ruth are married. Naomi and Ruth are no longer destitute. God has really turned it around for these ladies. But as a final gift in this ancient story, God gives Ruth a baby, Naomi a grandson. The baby is named Obed, who would be the father of Jesse, the father of King David whose lineage ultimately leads to Jesus. Life from death.
So what about you? Are you facing death? Literal death, death of a relationship, death of a dream,
death of faith, death of hope…. We all face it. Death is the human condition. This week as you read the
book of Ruth, I encourage you, in the face of your death, to embrace the life that God has for you. In the
midst of the destruction and starvation of the soul surrounding you, look for the life God is calling you
to.
Do you see the miracles God is working on your behalf? Do you see the offer of life He is reaching out to
you? If you don’t then one of two things is happening. One, you may have the wrong perspective. You
may have the perspective of Naomi who begs people to call her Mara because the Lord has abandoned
her and made her bitter. All the while she misses what God has already done. She is lacking faith to
understand that God is continuing to move.
Or two, you may be rolling around in your own death. You may be taking a bath in it. Dressing in it.
Refusing to leave it. What would have happened if Naomi stayed in Moab? If Ruth stayed in Moab? If
Ruth refused to work gleaning the fields? If Ruth didn’t ask Boaz to redeem their family? 2nd Peter 2:21-
22 says “It would have been better for them never to have known the way of life that God approves of
than to know it and turn their backs on the holy life God told them to live. These proverbs have come
true for them: ‘A dog goes back to its vomit,’ and ‘A sow that has been washed goes back to roll around
in the mud.’”
I hear a refrain from Deuteronomy, “I call on heaven and earth as witnesses today that I have offered
you life or death, blessings or curses. Choose life so that you and your descendants will live.” So that’s
it. Choose life, our Kinsman Redeemer is offering it.
Candice Roberts
As is true in the first seven books of the Bible, so it is true in the book of Ruth; God is the main character; we humans just play supporting roles. At the beginning of this great story we find that the people of God are in a time of famine. There is no food in Israel. And here is Naomi. In the first five verses of Ruth, Naomi moves to a foreign land to try and feed her family, her husband dies, her two sons marry and her two sons die. The events in these verses encompass well over a decade, but they are given such little attention, because they are the preface, what you need to understand before the story starts. You need to understand that death is the human condition and in these verses, the author shows us that Naomi, a child of God, is well acquainted with death. And here is where the story begins.
Naomi resigns to leave Moab and return home. She urges her daughter-in-laws to stay in Moab with their people and their god. But Ruth, a gentile, has come to know Yahweh as God because of Naomi’s influence in her life. She refuses to leave Naomi. And here we see the first instance in the book of Ruth where God exchanges death for life. Because of Ruth’s love for Yahweh and for her mother-in-law, we see that Naomi is given a companion, a friend. God has brought some light out of Naomi’s great darkness. Life from death.
As the two widows travel back to Israel, I wonder what their conversations were like. Would they be able to find food in Israel? Shelter? Would the women ever marry again? Would Ruth ever know what it feels like to be a mother, Naomi a grandmother? Naomi was grumbling, doubtful. Like we would be.
It’s okay that Naomi had her doubts. God was faithful. The two widows had shelter. Ruth was provided with an opportunity to work gleaning barley behind the reapers. She was given favor and the workers purposefully left behind more barley than usual so she could have enough. God was bringing provision where they were certain they would face destitution. Life from death.
Enter Boaz, a relative of Naomi’s deceased husband. Ruth asks him, at Naomi’s prompting, to be their kinsman redeemer. Ruth and Naomi had no way to pay their bills. They had debt and as widows they had few options. They could sell themselves as slaves and work off their debt. This was a common practice in Israel. Or they could find someone to save them from slavery- a kinsman redeemer. There were four requirements for a man to be a kinsman redeemer. The man had to be related, free of slavery himself, capable of paying the debt, and willing to pay the debt. Boaz met these requirements. He bought the land, paid their debts, and married Ruth. He saved them from slavery and gave them a heritage. God used Boaz to once again bring about life from death. And God used Boaz to foreshadow the ultimate Kinsman Redeemer who saved us from the slavery of sin and made us His bride. Jesus Christ, who is life, is OUR Kinsman Redeemer.
Boaz and Ruth are married. Naomi and Ruth are no longer destitute. God has really turned it around for these ladies. But as a final gift in this ancient story, God gives Ruth a baby, Naomi a grandson. The baby is named Obed, who would be the father of Jesse, the father of King David whose lineage ultimately leads to Jesus. Life from death.
So what about you? Are you facing death? Literal death, death of a relationship, death of a dream,
death of faith, death of hope…. We all face it. Death is the human condition. This week as you read the
book of Ruth, I encourage you, in the face of your death, to embrace the life that God has for you. In the
midst of the destruction and starvation of the soul surrounding you, look for the life God is calling you
to.
Do you see the miracles God is working on your behalf? Do you see the offer of life He is reaching out to
you? If you don’t then one of two things is happening. One, you may have the wrong perspective. You
may have the perspective of Naomi who begs people to call her Mara because the Lord has abandoned
her and made her bitter. All the while she misses what God has already done. She is lacking faith to
understand that God is continuing to move.
Or two, you may be rolling around in your own death. You may be taking a bath in it. Dressing in it.
Refusing to leave it. What would have happened if Naomi stayed in Moab? If Ruth stayed in Moab? If
Ruth refused to work gleaning the fields? If Ruth didn’t ask Boaz to redeem their family? 2nd Peter 2:21-
22 says “It would have been better for them never to have known the way of life that God approves of
than to know it and turn their backs on the holy life God told them to live. These proverbs have come
true for them: ‘A dog goes back to its vomit,’ and ‘A sow that has been washed goes back to roll around
in the mud.’”
I hear a refrain from Deuteronomy, “I call on heaven and earth as witnesses today that I have offered
you life or death, blessings or curses. Choose life so that you and your descendants will live.” So that’s
it. Choose life, our Kinsman Redeemer is offering it.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
The Book of Judges
The Life Project: Judges
Pastor Matt Roberts
The book of Judges spans about 350 years. It encompasses the time between Joshua’s death and the reign of Samuel. It was a tumultuous time with great rebellion in Israel. Judges 17:6 says “In those days Israel had no king, so the people did what seemed right in their own eyes.” This verse just about sums up the rule of the day. Israel had no king. The people did what they wanted, which generally included much evil. The people did evil and then the Lord punished them. He allowed other nations to overtake them. The Israelites, encouraged by their oppression, would cry out to the Lord to save them. And God in his mercy would send a judge, a leader, directed by God to champion the cause of the Israelites. This happened 12 times over. 12 times the people rebelled and 12 times God sent a leader to save them. I believe the Israelites were a little thick-headed. They sound a lot like us.
The 12 judges during the time period were leaders that God chose. But I might add that not all of these leaders were equal in effectiveness or righteousness. The book of Judges had its share of great leaders, who put the cause of Israel and the Lord above themselves. Consider Gideon who, though he felt unworthy, led an army of 300 to defeat tens of thousands of Midianites. Each step of the way Gideon listened to the voice of God. He was diligent; making sure he was listening only to the Lord. On the other hand Judges also had its share of immoral, selfish leaders, who were only able to save Israel because God had purposed it. Samson is a prime example. He was consumed by his own pride and sensuality. He used his great, God-given strength to avenge his own name. Samson ultimately met his demise when he allowed his lust for a Philistine woman to betray the calling of God on his life.
While reading Judges this week, I encourage you to contemplate what type of leader you want to be. Some of you may be hesitant to call yourself a leader at all. But the truth is, all of us have people that look to us for leadership. Are you a parent? Do you have siblings? Do you have people under you at work? Do you have friends? Then you have the opportunity to lead. You have the opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life, to make a difference in eternity. You have the opportunity to be a hero.
Brooke Foss Westcott, a theologian in the 1800’s, was noted for saying,
“Great occasions do not make heroes or cowards; they simply unveil them to the eyes of men. Silently and imperceptibly, as we wake or sleep, we grow strong or weak; and at last some crisis shows what we have become.” The question is then, how do we grow strong, so that we are ready, when the time arises, to be heroes for the Kingdom?
Ephesians 6:13 -18 (The Message) says this:
Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other's spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.
From this passage in Ephesians I think we can gain five keys for unlocking our inner hero:
1. Realize the call is bigger than us. “You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own.” Remember Gideon? God tells him to pare down his army. Judges 7:2 “The Lord said to Gideon, ‘you have too many warriors with you. If I let all of you fight the Midianites, the Israelites will boast to me that they saved themselves by their own strength.’” See God does the work. A good leader is just a vessel, a tool for our Lord.
2. Have Faith. Hebrews 11 is often referred to as the Hall of Faith. It lists great men and women were believed God, who trusted Him and therefore received what God had promised. Guess what? In Hebrews 11:32, 3 of the Judges from ancient Israel are listed. Even Samson gets a shout out. Not because of his righteousness, but because of his faith that God would do what He said He would. (Our righteousness is as filthy rags anyway, right?)
3. Righteousness and salvation. They go hand in hand. And we are incapable of either on our own. We must look to Christ for our right-thinking and right-living. Gideon knew the importance of being ruled by God. In Judges 8:23 the people ask him to be their king and Gideon responds, “I will not rule over you, nor will my son. The Lord will rule over you.”
4. God’s Word. 2nd Timothy 3:16-17 (ESV) says, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of Godmay be competent, equipped for every good work.” Equipped, ready, heroic.
5. Prayer. It is how we get our marching orders. As leaders we have to be attuned to what God is doing. Gideon didn’t make a move until he knew God was speaking, and he did exactly as the Lord commanded him. We’ve been called to be tools that God can use. God is bringing salvation to His people and just as He used the Judges of old, He has chosen to use us. Are we ready?
Suggested Reading In Judges
Monday, 2/20/12 - Judges 1-3
Tuesday, 2/21/12 - Judges 4-7
Wednesday, 2/22/12 - Judges 8-11
Thursday, 2/23/12 - Judges 12-15
Friday, 2/24/12 - Judges 16-18
Saturday, 2/25/12 - Judges 19-21
Pastor Matt Roberts
The book of Judges spans about 350 years. It encompasses the time between Joshua’s death and the reign of Samuel. It was a tumultuous time with great rebellion in Israel. Judges 17:6 says “In those days Israel had no king, so the people did what seemed right in their own eyes.” This verse just about sums up the rule of the day. Israel had no king. The people did what they wanted, which generally included much evil. The people did evil and then the Lord punished them. He allowed other nations to overtake them. The Israelites, encouraged by their oppression, would cry out to the Lord to save them. And God in his mercy would send a judge, a leader, directed by God to champion the cause of the Israelites. This happened 12 times over. 12 times the people rebelled and 12 times God sent a leader to save them. I believe the Israelites were a little thick-headed. They sound a lot like us.
The 12 judges during the time period were leaders that God chose. But I might add that not all of these leaders were equal in effectiveness or righteousness. The book of Judges had its share of great leaders, who put the cause of Israel and the Lord above themselves. Consider Gideon who, though he felt unworthy, led an army of 300 to defeat tens of thousands of Midianites. Each step of the way Gideon listened to the voice of God. He was diligent; making sure he was listening only to the Lord. On the other hand Judges also had its share of immoral, selfish leaders, who were only able to save Israel because God had purposed it. Samson is a prime example. He was consumed by his own pride and sensuality. He used his great, God-given strength to avenge his own name. Samson ultimately met his demise when he allowed his lust for a Philistine woman to betray the calling of God on his life.
While reading Judges this week, I encourage you to contemplate what type of leader you want to be. Some of you may be hesitant to call yourself a leader at all. But the truth is, all of us have people that look to us for leadership. Are you a parent? Do you have siblings? Do you have people under you at work? Do you have friends? Then you have the opportunity to lead. You have the opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life, to make a difference in eternity. You have the opportunity to be a hero.
Brooke Foss Westcott, a theologian in the 1800’s, was noted for saying,
“Great occasions do not make heroes or cowards; they simply unveil them to the eyes of men. Silently and imperceptibly, as we wake or sleep, we grow strong or weak; and at last some crisis shows what we have become.” The question is then, how do we grow strong, so that we are ready, when the time arises, to be heroes for the Kingdom?
Ephesians 6:13 -18 (The Message) says this:
Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other's spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.
From this passage in Ephesians I think we can gain five keys for unlocking our inner hero:
1. Realize the call is bigger than us. “You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own.” Remember Gideon? God tells him to pare down his army. Judges 7:2 “The Lord said to Gideon, ‘you have too many warriors with you. If I let all of you fight the Midianites, the Israelites will boast to me that they saved themselves by their own strength.’” See God does the work. A good leader is just a vessel, a tool for our Lord.
2. Have Faith. Hebrews 11 is often referred to as the Hall of Faith. It lists great men and women were believed God, who trusted Him and therefore received what God had promised. Guess what? In Hebrews 11:32, 3 of the Judges from ancient Israel are listed. Even Samson gets a shout out. Not because of his righteousness, but because of his faith that God would do what He said He would. (Our righteousness is as filthy rags anyway, right?)
3. Righteousness and salvation. They go hand in hand. And we are incapable of either on our own. We must look to Christ for our right-thinking and right-living. Gideon knew the importance of being ruled by God. In Judges 8:23 the people ask him to be their king and Gideon responds, “I will not rule over you, nor will my son. The Lord will rule over you.”
4. God’s Word. 2nd Timothy 3:16-17 (ESV) says, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of Godmay be competent, equipped for every good work.” Equipped, ready, heroic.
5. Prayer. It is how we get our marching orders. As leaders we have to be attuned to what God is doing. Gideon didn’t make a move until he knew God was speaking, and he did exactly as the Lord commanded him. We’ve been called to be tools that God can use. God is bringing salvation to His people and just as He used the Judges of old, He has chosen to use us. Are we ready?
Suggested Reading In Judges
Monday, 2/20/12 - Judges 1-3
Tuesday, 2/21/12 - Judges 4-7
Wednesday, 2/22/12 - Judges 8-11
Thursday, 2/23/12 - Judges 12-15
Friday, 2/24/12 - Judges 16-18
Saturday, 2/25/12 - Judges 19-21
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Newsboys Concert 2012
Oh. My. Goodness.
I took Ty to see the Newsboys at a church in Layton last night. It was freaking amazing. We upgraded to the Gold Section and got to sit on cushy chairs on the floor. It was open seating but we got there in enough time to get on the 2nd row.
The first band was Anthem Lights, who I've heard a bit on KLove. The second band was Abandon, who I've never heard of before. The third band was The City Harmonic, and I've heard them on KLove and have a couple of their songs on my iPod. Then there was an intermission and they set up the stage for the Newsboys.
What an experience. The lighting. The stage. The energy of the band. The dummer was amazing. This was a big stadium production that was squeezed into a little church in Northern Utah. We were so blessed by these men of God making a joyful noise. It was a worship experience, that's for sure.
I've got some video too that I'd like to share but can't figure out how to post it. Please leave me a comment if you can be of help. Thanks!
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Giving It To God - My Testimony
I have a friend on Facebook who I read his status updates and my heart breaks for him. He so desperatly wants to be in a relationship with someone and it doesn't sound like this person has the same interest. I can tell his hope, his despair, his anxiety... and it reminds me of a place that I was at a few years ago.
In 2005 I got divorced from my husband of 7 years. I had two small children, a good job, and a house of my own. I started dating someone who had been a good friend of mine... things clicked, we had future plans, we were together all the time, etc... and the bottom fell out of that relationship. It made me think more about my dad leaving us and never turning back. I felt like something was wrong with me for all these relationships not to work out.
I was devistated. I was hurt, I was broken, I was sad beyond belief. I couldnt function and all I wanted to do was cry. I felt that I was useless, I felt that I was not worthy of someone's love and it sent me into a tailspin.
You see, I am a very independant person. I have never relied on a man for anything in my life and for whatever reason when this relationship didnt work out as planned, it crushed me. I was very jaded on the thought of another relationship so I drank more than I am now proud of and did some things I am even less proud of... but the fact of the matter is, that's my past. I dont live there anymore.
Somehow in the mist of dancing on pianos and doing Jager shots, God was talking to me. He was telling me that I am better than all that. He was telling me that is no way for me to live my life. He was telling me that I am loved by Him, even if I wasnt loved by that boyfriend or that father anymore.
As you know... I grew up Catholic. We were pretty religious in the sence of going to church every Sunday and memorizing prayers but as I went through my divorce, I realized that it wasnt the place for me anymore. I did a little research and started going to a Lutheran church where I met some amazing people... but I felt like I was going through the motions. One of the ladies I met introduced me to another Christian church and it was that day that I gave my life to Christ. I always felt like I knew Him, but the truth of the matter is I knew religion... I knew rules. I knew traditions. But I didnt know Him. I didnt have a relationship with Him that I do today.
My life is at a place of peace... my life isnt perfect, but with Him beside me I can get through it. It was by God's grace that we dealt with my mom's cancer as we did. It was by God's grace that I met my husband and he has now started a walk with Jesus as well. It is by God's grace that I am raising some God-loving children.
I couldnt do it on my own... I had to give it to God for the pieces to fall in place. I'm not saying it was easy... there was a lot of times (and still times) that I want control. I want to do things my way... and that's when things start to fall apart. I have to remember that God has a plan for me. I have to trust and be faithful. By accepting Jesus into my heart, I dont need the rules and traditions and whatnot that religion brings. Those rules and traditions lead to depression and anxiety. Those rules and traditions lead to feelings of unworthiness. That's not what God's love is about, He wants us to be happy.
So for my friend... I pray that he sits back and listens for God. That still small voice will lead him to where he should be, I just know it. Giving it to God isnt easy, but its so worth it.
In 2005 I got divorced from my husband of 7 years. I had two small children, a good job, and a house of my own. I started dating someone who had been a good friend of mine... things clicked, we had future plans, we were together all the time, etc... and the bottom fell out of that relationship. It made me think more about my dad leaving us and never turning back. I felt like something was wrong with me for all these relationships not to work out.
I was devistated. I was hurt, I was broken, I was sad beyond belief. I couldnt function and all I wanted to do was cry. I felt that I was useless, I felt that I was not worthy of someone's love and it sent me into a tailspin.
You see, I am a very independant person. I have never relied on a man for anything in my life and for whatever reason when this relationship didnt work out as planned, it crushed me. I was very jaded on the thought of another relationship so I drank more than I am now proud of and did some things I am even less proud of... but the fact of the matter is, that's my past. I dont live there anymore.
Somehow in the mist of dancing on pianos and doing Jager shots, God was talking to me. He was telling me that I am better than all that. He was telling me that is no way for me to live my life. He was telling me that I am loved by Him, even if I wasnt loved by that boyfriend or that father anymore.
As you know... I grew up Catholic. We were pretty religious in the sence of going to church every Sunday and memorizing prayers but as I went through my divorce, I realized that it wasnt the place for me anymore. I did a little research and started going to a Lutheran church where I met some amazing people... but I felt like I was going through the motions. One of the ladies I met introduced me to another Christian church and it was that day that I gave my life to Christ. I always felt like I knew Him, but the truth of the matter is I knew religion... I knew rules. I knew traditions. But I didnt know Him. I didnt have a relationship with Him that I do today.
My life is at a place of peace... my life isnt perfect, but with Him beside me I can get through it. It was by God's grace that we dealt with my mom's cancer as we did. It was by God's grace that I met my husband and he has now started a walk with Jesus as well. It is by God's grace that I am raising some God-loving children.
I couldnt do it on my own... I had to give it to God for the pieces to fall in place. I'm not saying it was easy... there was a lot of times (and still times) that I want control. I want to do things my way... and that's when things start to fall apart. I have to remember that God has a plan for me. I have to trust and be faithful. By accepting Jesus into my heart, I dont need the rules and traditions and whatnot that religion brings. Those rules and traditions lead to depression and anxiety. Those rules and traditions lead to feelings of unworthiness. That's not what God's love is about, He wants us to be happy.
So for my friend... I pray that he sits back and listens for God. That still small voice will lead him to where he should be, I just know it. Giving it to God isnt easy, but its so worth it.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Time To Confess
I confess... I am irritated with my weight loss this week. I have worked my hardest, ate my best, and I am going up on the scale. I feel a little defeated. I hear alot of people say "that's b/c you are gaining muscle"... well, that's great, but until I see the scale going down instead of up I get upset.
I confess... I prayed this morning about this fitness adventure. It told God that I am going to keep at it, I am going to keep working hard b/c my goal is to be in top shape so I can best serve His people in Guatemala in a few months. If that means I dont look slimmer or go down a pants size, that's b/c I am supposed to look like I do... but I want my heart physically (emotionally and mentionally) to be healthy.
I confess... I tried my husband's Boom! supplement yesterday before the gym. I had a burst of energy and had my hardest workout on the Arc Trainer. I did it again today and thought I was going to die, but I pushed through and finished all 30 minutes. Phew, I am tired!
I confess... I got upset with my ex this week. This weekend is his holiday, he's known this for months and text me telling me he has to work on Saturday and on Monday so he decided not to take the kids. And for me NOT to call his family b/c I shouldnt burden them. Really? I think of my children as a blessing and a joy, not a burden. I know for a fact that they dont feel that way... I think there is only one person who does and that's him. It makes me sad. The good thing is my kids KNOW they are loved, regardless of that.
I confess... my ex also told me he is having surgery in March, right before the weekend he is supposed to have the kids. He told us this after he told us he isnt having the kids for President's Day and my daughter got mad and said, "Im calling Grandma". I told her to make sure Grandma knew it was her that wants to be there, not that I am asking for it b/c I am fine with them being home... so she calls her Grandma and says " My dad's having surgery and he wont take us that weekend... but you want us huh?". I could hear his mom say "Of course...we'll work out the details". I am so thankful for the people that my children have in their life and that they are mature enough to see passed the crappy parts.
I confess... my daughter is having a sleepover with a friend tonight and I am happy to have some time with Drewby. Even if he'd rather go to McDonald's than Cafe Zupa (which is what I am craving).
What are you confessing? Swing over to Mamarazzi's blog and link up!
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Weigh In Wednesday
I think I am going to start saving my updates for Friday... because I allow my weekends for cheat days (maybe not being as religious about what goes in my mouth, but still by no means over doing it... as well as not going to the gym one of the two days) it takes a few more days to get in gear... so maybe I'll call it "Fitness Friday" or something instead :)
One strange thing... and I dont know what to do about it... On Friday, I was down to my lowest weight so far. Saturday, I was up 2 pounds. I forgot to weigh on Sunday. Monday, I was up 5 pounds. WHAT?!?
I bought a new scale thinking this one was malfunctioning... get it out of the box, set it up, and it tells me I am 2 pounds heavier than the old scale did. This is so discouraging to me. I can see a difference... I am eating well... I am at the gym every morning and increasing my excercise. It's just frustrating to me... so today, I didnt weight myself. I am frustrated at the moment and I took it out on the Arc Trainer this morning... I did 25 minute on that beast and feel fabulous so I am just going to focus on that for a bit and not worry what the poundage says for now.
BUT... if anyone has any ideas, tips, suggestions I am open to hearing them.
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