I found out at dinner last night they are thinking of having my mom do radiation when her chemo is done in November. I know that radiation has less side effects than chemo does, but it still sent me over the edge. She has been through so much. Why do we have do to more? I just went home and cried.
I emailed her that question, along with alot of my other feelings, and her reply was b/c the tumor was so close to her chest wall and it went into her lymph nodes there is a better chance of getting it taken care of for good if she does this. Ok... well, that's a good answer. More than anything I want it to be gone and not to have to worry about it anymore.
She says she knows its hard on me to see her look different, walk slower, sleep more... but just keep praying b/c God knows what he is doing.
I'm just having some moments of weakness. I am not a strong person when it comes to emotions but I do have a strong belief in God, that is something that will not ever go weak. Someone once told me to "trust and believe".... so when I feel the tears start welling up, that's my new mantra.
***Also, mom's BRCA results came back negative. Which means, if I have the breast cancer gene, it would come from my biological dad's side of the family ***
1 comment:
Stay strong and keep expressing your feelings. It is very healthy to do what you are doing. That's good news about the gene test, right? That means you won't be scheduling a surgery?
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